In the Deep End!

Photo by Christoffer Engström on Unsplash

Do ya ever feel like you’ve been pushed into the deep end of the pool? I had a little sister that would do that! What a shock! Hitting the cold surface of the water totally unprepared leaves a body sputtering.

Both my sister and I learned to swim at about the age of two. By the age of five we were practically half fish. We loved swimming and all sorts of water play. When it came to water we were there!

My sister had a habit of creeping up with soundless footsteps, and just how did she do that?! I could never walk that quietly! Totally unfair! Oops! Sorry! Sibling rivalry strikes again!

Weaving stories in my head, I’d wander the edge of the pool. I was figuring out what my heroine was up to. Then, how the hero would save her from her nemesis. I rarely felt her presence or heard her approach.

All of the sudden there was a shove in the shoulder and a loud splash as the cold water swallowed me whole. I would claw my way to surface rising from the water splashing and foaming, probably at the mouth. Only to be met with peals of laughter.

Now in my sister’s defense, I don’t ever remember her pushing me into the shallow end. And if given the chance, I wasn’t above pushing her in the deep end either. I just wasn’t as good at the sneak as she was! But neither of us would risk the wrath of Mom by a push that might cause severe injury to our sibling. We might have been a little mean, just a little bit, mean but we weren’t stupid!

Life can feel like being pushed into the deep end. Life in Milly’s Realm certainly feels like that now. Somewhere in the middle of April we got shoved into deep water. Dad’s living situation became downright dangerous. Harsh reality splashed cold in my face. I barely took a breath before plunging into the depths of the watery world in-between generations. The choice was swim or swim.

As we pushed through May we struggled to the surface above the reams of paper floating in water above. We swam through the forms, meetings, investigations, and evaluations. We thought we were going to drown in the tidal wave of tasks.

Finally in the beginning of June we pushed to the surface and gasped for air as the pace slowed a bit. Not everything was complete, the legal process was in play; applications pending. But, we were able to tread water and catch up with the housework a bit. Here’s the thing with treading water; ya don’ get where you need to go.

Storm clouds began to brew in late June. Eldest Prince returned to the castle. Then the VA application was put on hold. There’s more financial work to do. The insomnia starts. Dad begins his pattern of verbal battering. The storm draws closer. Is that a waterspout I see? I don’t see a shoreline in any direction. A wave crashes over. What’s a girl to do? START SWIMMING! This is not a time to rest.

Today I was thinking about the Apostle Paul in 2 Timothy 4:7. In his letter Paul writes: “I have competed well; I have finished the race; I have kept the faith [NABRE].” Paul is facing the end of his life. It strikes me he does not say he won. He does not say “I’m the most awesome Apostle!” The emphasis I find today is Paul finished the race. He got to the place God meant him to be. He got to the finish line without giving up. That is what I want. I want to finish the race.

I tend to think of my adventure journey as being on land. But in this part of the race I can’t find my footing. To keep ahead of the tasks I must keep moving…like swimming. If I float the current carries me further away. To move ahead I have to swim. I must trust in my Savior, my Deliverer, my Liberator, my Protector… He taught me to swim. I can do this. Go to the surface and swim. It’s all part of the race. Is this a triathlon? {chuckle}

Unlike my verse today, my race is not over yet. The scripture gives me courage to continue the adventure journey. Whether I climb the mountain or swim the in the deep end I will continue to follow where He leads.

He will see us through our adventure! Hang on it’s a wild ride on rough seas! Woo Hoo Y’all!


2 thoughts on “In the Deep End!

  1. I’m reading your blog Milly, and I couldn’t help but to think of 1 of God’s men that found himself in somewhat the same position. Jeremiah, was in prison and and feeling kind of lost when the word of the Lord came to him saying ” behold I am the Lord the God of All Flesh is there anything too hard for me?” And then again he tells him” call upon me and I will answer thee and show the great and Mighty things which thou knowest not” Jeremiah Was to get out of prison, but his life was threatened many times even by his own family but God was faithful and saw him through all of his problems. Hang on Milly!


    1. Thank you Gayle for the lead on Jeremiah. It’s been a while since I’ve read through his story. I didn’t realize his own family threatened him also. How he must of felt terribly alone in the world. His insights from God keep popping up in my readings. I’ll have to do some more reading in his book. God bless Milly


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