Did you know you could be a “tween” again? I didn’t know until just recently. I discovered I’m back in that awkward phase. Who woulda thunk it!

The last few posts have gotten me thinking about where I am in my life. I’m smack dab in the middle of the transition from mom to me. I saw the change coming. Whether I wanted it or not, it was gonna to happen.

My dear husband and I are In-between our parents and our kids, careers and dreams, youth and old age… And you thought you were a “tween” only once in your life. Oh No! {Yes, I’m waving my finger side to side} It’s not just for preteens. I’m finding it’s a growth phase for whenever you decide to go for something bigger than you are at the moment.

Back in the day when I was a tween, I longed to spread my wings in high school and to grow into my body. It was painful and exhilarating. At that time I was growing from child to young woman. It was an unavoidable change. It was going to happen no matter what! I was gangly and awkward. How was I supposed to be a woman? I wondered.

The caterpillar likes to mosey along the branches eating and resting. Eventually God tugs at the caterpillar to wrap itself in a cocoon. After waiting for God’s transformation the butterfly struggles to get out of the casing. It awkwardly straightens its wings to dry them in the sun. This is the ‘tween’ time for the caterpillar/butterfly. It has to be cramped and weird wrapped in a cocoon. Then the work to get out! Oh Boy! Straightening the wings and drying them until they are ready for flight. Talk about embarrassing. “Is anyone watching? Don’t take my picture human! I’m not ready!”

When we feel the tug to transform ourselves into something new, we enter the ‘tween’ stage of transition. The change can be a decision, like a new job. It can be unavoidable like moving from parent to elder. The process is uncomfortable. It doesn’t feel good. The territory is unknown. If you’re like me, you might want to back it up and go back to that comfortable spot on the parsley and start munching again.

Now I am between everything in my life again. It’s awkward! That’s the only word for it. The good thing is, I do have a better perspective now that I’m fifty-cough-something than when I was about twelve. Of course being twelve I wasn’t responsible for my dad’s life and launching adults into the world. I would hope I learned something in the forty-odd years in-between! Ack! there’s that word again! It keeps coming up! In-between! Which has the slang word ‘tween’ in it.

Isn’t that what a tween is? It is someone in the middle of an adventure journey. The middle of the journey is where you can barely see the beginning and definitely can’t see the end. It’s awkward to find our footing and get coherent directions. {can you hear the sarcasm!} Hello! anybody there with guidance?

Here’s what it means for my adventure journey. I’m about half-way through this transition! When I start feeling like an awkward tween, I’ve already made progress on the journey. Today I was looking for scripture to confirm what I am thinking. I went through several word searches before Romans 12:2 NABRE resonated with me. The Apostle Paul writes:

“Do not conform yourselves to this age but be transformed by the renewal of your mind, that you may discern what is the will of God, what is good and pleasing and perfect.”

This adventure journey I started a couple of years ago has forced me to depend on God every day. I decided to face my transition to the inevitable empty nest before it suprised me. As a part of that decision I decided to write a blog about reaching for my dreams. I wanted to share my journey through life’s transitions. What I found is I am sharing my walk with my Lord and Savior. I hope He finds this adventure good and pleasing.

What calls to me in Romans 12:2 is not conforming to the norms (this age). I will be transformed by the renewal of my mind. My mind-set has changed even in the two years I’ve been writing my blog. I see a difference in my posts. I am closer to God.

I don’t know if anyone likes the change or not but it is what is happening.  I’ve stopped munching my way through life and now I am encased in a time of waiting. It’s uncomfortable in the tween/cocoon stages. I’m looking forward to seeing where next part of the journey will take me.

Today, I embrace my scared frustrated tween girl. “It’s going to be alright.” I tell her. Remember it’s grand to finish the journey but the stories are in the adventures that got you through the change!

Milly

P.S. I find it awkward to type the word awkward! What’s with the “wkw” in the middle of the word? How awkward is that! Just my mind musing 😉