Yesterday was exhausting! I am deep in preparation mode. Dad is still in Hospice. I feel need to get as much done as possible before he passes to the other side of life.
Here’s the background. Yesterday, I took the afternoon off to meet with the Funeral Director. We planned the funeral, went to early voting, and handed out treats to the Halloween revelers. I only made it to eight thirty before the pain set in. I packed it in and took off for my hot shower.
I woke this morning still feeling inflammatory pain. As I prepared for work I thought about how I’ve never lost a parent, planned a funeral, or a repass. I also have not had someone close to me die slowly. Clarity hit me. It is another one of God’s gifts.
God has gifted me with time. This morning it was a blessing to wake knowing the big funeral arrangements are made. The rest is just details. Except…maybe…the Repass?Between you and me, not sure how to pull that off! But! I know God has it well in hand. He has my dad wrapped in His Presence as they walk at God’s pace through dad’s valley of the shadow of death1 .
Dad is not waiting for anything. He is now on God’s timetable. I am Martha to the living and dad sits at Jesus’s feet2. I prepare, he waits. It is all in God’s time and my spirit knows it is good.
My human head is not on the same plane of existence! Driving to work I turned on the radio, for the traffic of course. They chattered about the President and politics. My mind wandered to how tired and achy I was from the day before. I wondered how I would make it through the day. I thought of how hard it is to be a caregiver with chronic pain.
My thoughts turned to wondering if I could not handle dad without the help I get through the day. First is the Holy Trinity; God, Jesus, and the Holy Spirit. Then there is my husband, my moms, the assisted living facility, doctors (ours and dads), the attorneys, my princes and princess, the angels at Hospice, and so many friends. I said a little prayer of thanks. Grateful for God’s help and comfort through those around me.
God understands the weakness in my body. He and I have come a long way in healing this body. I admit it. I must trust Him day by day to get me though the hours. He knows how much I lean on him for support. He gives and gives and gives in the most amazing ways. At these humbling thoughts, gratitude settled in my being.
My thinking turned to those that do not have help in these situations. God has blessed me with the means to care for my dad. There are others who shoulder more responsibility in their path. I said a prayer for God’s peace, comfort and strength for those that walk a harder care giving path.
Maybe they have to make rapid decisions because death came swift. Maybe they don’t have access to the medical care my dad was able to receive. We can speculate about the reasons but speculation does no one any good. God knows what they need. I have faith he is sending angels to flight for someone in a care taking role. Someone I don’t even know. Because, the Holy Spirit placed it in my mind to pray on my morning drive and God always answers prayers.
We may not know the outcome of our prayers. We just need to trust that God puts action behind every prayer. If you are up for the challenge, send your prayers to heaven for someone in a similar situation as yours. Don’t wonder about the result. Just bless someone you don’t know at the moment and let God do what he does best!
God bless you,