I’m still going through papers and what do I find? another dream list from 2012. Imagine my surprise finding dreams when I’m throwing as much paper in the trash or shredder as I can. It was like Erk…back-up! What was that? Continue reading “Dreams Part Duex”
Isn’t it just like life when you start looking at something closely you find it around every corner? As you know, I’m learning the bittersweet. Right now I’m seeing the bitter…Everywhere!
The word in English actual means sweet with a bitter aftertaste, or a poisonous climbing plant. I still haven’t found the word “bittersweet” in the bible. There are lots of references to “bitter” and to “sweet.” A few references have both words in them. I haven’t even broached poisonous vines yet! Whew! this word study is going to take a while!
Now personally, I would love to only focus on the sweet! I mean I do love sweet stuff! I decided to tackle the passages dealing with bitter and sweet together first. There are less of those references. But God seems to have other plans for me.
One of the things I do when I embark on a word study is open my eyes to the word in my surroundings. It makes me hyper-aware of my world in relation to the study journey I am taking. Well…Lately I’m seeing bitter everywhere. Makes me want to stamp my foot! “Lord I want the sweetness too!”
I think I heard that chuckle as I look heavenward. He knows what I need even when I don’t want to follow the path, little stubborn ewe that I am. I was cleaning out my emails and came across Girlfriends in God email from www.crosswalk.com.
The email was from a few weeks ago. The title caught my eye, A Bitter Cup. Of course I had to open it and read the contents. I couldn’t resist. Cleaning out my email would wait another day…right?
Well this girlfriend discussed the bitter cups in our lives. She describes how parents can pour their bitterness out to their children. As the children sip from the cup of bitterness they grow bitter roots.
I sat back and thought I can relate to that. My father grew up with a bitter father. He learned the bitter at the knee of his father. Now as an elder man he follows the same path by keeping his bitterness in his soul. I watch his bitterness morphing into fear, paranoia, and distrust. The bitter root rules his old age.
In contrast, my mother grew up with a bitter alcoholic mother. She made a decision as a young woman to follow Jesus Christ. She also made the decision to learn from her parents and be a better parent. The path she chose was very different from the one she learned as a child. When we get together she is filled with love, joy and peace. The essence of the Holy Spirit surrounds her.
I have to say I am blessed to have the contrasting examples. If I pay attention I will find my way. I continued to read the email. At one point the girlfriend talks about a teacher who taught her when life hands you a bitter cup, it is you need to drink all of it, not to pass it to others (I have paraphrased here). The verse she chose for the devotional is:
Hebrews 12:15 (I used the NABRE): “See to it that no one be deprived of the grace of God that no bitter root spring up and cause trouble, through which many may become defiled,”
When I read this I thought of all the ways we spread our cup of bitterness with those around us (whether they want it or not). My father spits out his bitterness with verbal abuse. I thought of the times I’ve spread gossip, and division. How I’ve commiserated with others. Ya know the “woe is me” game. “My problems are bigger than yours “competition. I’m not proud of it but, these are some of the ways I have participated in sharing the bitter cup.
It’s not easy right now. Life swirls around me with anxiety and stress. But, remember back to where God was teaching me about my roots. In one of the posts I found I can dig the unwanted roots out of my garden. After looking at the contrast between my parents I find; if I choose to trust God today, I am digging out the bitter root of my fathers.
I may get my hands dirty but…I choose to dig! May the peace of God rest in your soul.
I wonder about a lot of stuff. My head buzzes with activity in my waking hours. This morning I was sitting with my coffee, waking up, and wondering what I might write about this weekend. Continue reading “I Wonder… (Daily Prompt: Wonder)”
It is said, “Live Life without Limits.” Growing up my dad taught me, I had no limits. I could do or be anything I set my mind to. Recently, I discovered that line of thinking is not necessarily true…
Deep down, I knew it all along. I also denied it for most of my adult life. Even struggling with pain for the last fourteen years (has it been that long? Yeah I guess so). I did not accept limitations for myself. I pushed through the pain. I told myself, “No pain, no gain!” And “Work through the pain!” Oh, and don’t forget the classic, “Mind over matter!”
Yes, the eldest Prince has moved out or as he put it “I have effectively moved out.” And since when did my Prince talk like that? My Prince has become a man right before my eyes. The nest is a little emptier without him. Continue reading “My Eagle Fledged”